Since May is Melanoma Awareness Month, I’ve invited others affected by melanoma to guest blog on the 7th, 14th and the 21st. I’ll wrap up the month by blogging again on the 28th. Today’s blog is written by Brett Yates. Enjoy.
We’ve all been conditioned to get our regular checkups, right? A physical every year. A dental cleaning twice a year. We even get the car oil changed every 3 months. Why isn’t a skin cancer screening on that list of necessities we take care of each year? It should be.
We had known that its return was possible for years, but if I’m honest I wasn’t considering it seriously. So, on January 31, 2011, it was with great surprise and shock we learned that my father’s melanoma had spread. Dad was first diagnosed with melanoma in 2007 when a tumor was found growing on his shoulder. It was surgically removed and he hoped that would be the last he would hear of it. It returned 3 years later and was again surgically removed. But this time it stuck around. Tumors were discovered in his liver, lungs, spinal cord, and brain.
From the time of Dad’s original melanoma diagnosis in 2007 to the end of 2010 before his tumor metastasized, his life was fairly normal. He was getting checked regularly and doing everything a person with a melanoma diagnosis should do. However, once the cancer spread, it did so with a vengeance. We had less than 3 months with him after the stage IV diagnosis.
My brother, Dustin, recalls one of Dad’s last outings:
“I remember Dad had wanted to go down to the KWWL studios for quite some time for a tour and we finally got it scheduled. It just so happened to fall on Valentine’s Day 2011. We made an evening of it and surprised him before we went out to eat. He had no idea that we had been planning it. He was very surprised. He got to meet the whole group and even got to sit in Ron’s chair. I’m forever grateful to Mark [Schnackenberg], more than he’ll ever know, for being so generous in allowing us to come for a tour and even hang out for both of the evening newscasts.
Who would have known at the time that it was one of the last outings with Dad. It also turned out to be the last picture of him. Looking back at it now, I can’t help but think how very thankful I am that we were able to do that for him.“
Who Was My Father?
To give you an idea of who my father was, what his effect on the world was, I need only tell you about his visitation. I stood for nearly 4 hours greeting a line of people wrapped around the block who had come to pay their respects. Many waited in line for an hour and a half before reaching the visitation room. My father had an effect on people the extent of which I hadn’t truly known until that visitation. He had a quiet emotion that was often hidden behind his strong, boisterous personality. I think that is what endeared him to so many people. He loved life so clearly and loved the company of others. It’s that effect on people we should all strive to replicate. And if we’re lucky, maybe we’ll have the same turnout when it’s our time.
How We’re Fighting Melanoma Now
Playing golf was one of Dad’s favorite pastimes, so every year around the anniversary of his death, we gather to celebrate his life over a round of golf with the goal to raise money for research and awareness of melanoma. To date, and with the help of everyone who participates and donates, the tournament has raised over $50,000 for research being done by Dr. Mo and his team at the University of Iowa.
My mother describes the reason for wanting to do the golf tournament by quoting something she read once:
Why does God allow disasters to happen? Is He punishing us? The Bible does not give an adequate explanation for disasters any more than it can for diseases such as cancer. There are times when no answers will do. There are times when nothing else will do except we roll up our sleeves and pitch in to do whatever we can to reverse the bad fortune of the moment.
We’re hoping to do the golf tournament each year to continue the fight against this terrible disease. We would love to get more people involved. If you’ve been affected by melanoma in some way, maybe you have a family member who has died, maybe you’ve survived melanoma yourself, or maybe you just want to be involved, we’d love to hear from you. This past year, Molly Menard, who wrote last week’s post, was there with doctors from Iowa City who volunteered their time for free skin cancer screenings. Those screenings may have saved someone’s life!
Let’s work together to end this disease. We’d love to acknowledge you and your family at the event. We’ll even change the name of the tournament to the Iowa Melanoma Golf Tournament (or something more catchy :)) if more families join the cause. You can learn more about the tournament at www.steveyatesmelanomaawareness.org.
A Final Note From Dad
I’ll leave you with words from Dad himself. Quoted below is an email he sent to his colleagues at John Deere upon his retirement. It is surprisingly appropriate, especially if you think of his retiring not just from 31 years of work, but from 63 years of life.
“Well my time has come. It’s time to hit the send button on this last e-mail.
Today is my last day as an active John Deere employee. I do not know where the time has gone. It has been a good run, but I am looking forward to the change. I’ve known many of you for more than 30 years. Some say the toughest part of retiring is saying goodbye to friends and colleagues…
Well, for me…what they say is true.
I wish each of you all the best in the years to come, both within John Deere and personally.
I’ve enjoyed working with…and knowing…all of you.
God’s rich blessings and best wishes to each of you.
If you need a 4th to complete a foursome sometime…give me a call.
Cheers and Have a Wonderful Life!!”